Musician’s Log. Stardate Monday 13th December

What an interesting few days…

In my previous blog entry I posted a poem that was dedicated to a friend that had passed away. Last Wednesday I attended her funeral and read it at the end of the service. It was extremely emotional and I struggled to get the words out through the tears and the knot in my chest. I hope that she would have been proud of me and touched by the poem. Her husband thanked me endlessly for paying tribute to her in such a way and her friends and family offered kind words about my writing… it was a strange feeling, a kind of hollow praise considering the circumstances in which it was created and I didn’t really like the attention. But part of me was touched that people were moved by it – a few apparently brought to tears. It was a day that shook me. I miss her.

The rest of the week vanished in a blur of sickness and work.

Saturday, however, made everything better. I went to see The Venus Papers – a one woman show written and performed by the lovely and extremely talented Lydia Towsey. She was amazing. I was spellbound the entire way through. I sat with friends and we all knew how talented she was but she shocked the entire audience. It had the right balance of accompanying music and background visuals that highlighted her poetry but didn’t distract you from what she was saying. I loved the story. It was so moving and thought provoking, and at one point I was near tears. So strongly written. The clothes worked, the lighting worked, the imagery worked – and she had the coolest giant shell on the stage as a prop. It looked like it could’ve been real!  I adore Lydia and it was lovely to see her accomplish something so wonderful. I gave her a lot of praise and comments on just how well she did but I’m sure she won’t mind more praise haha! And Saturday night was the perfect end to the day – hanging out with some of the people I adore most in the world. They are a blessing.

Today saw me back at Charnwood Museum, the site of Lyric Lounge Loughborough, to make a small film about the festival. That festival really touched me and thinking about really makes me smile – both Lyric Lounges I had the honour of working at touched me, gave me a great sense of what I wanted to do and helped with my self-confidence. I learned a lot about myself.

I’ve been taking a break from writing – now and then things come to me and I jot them down but I haven’t been as forceful with myself. I’m mostly frustrated with trying to finish Skeletons and won’t let myself start anything new until I do that so I’m letting my ideas bubble and brew and then I’ll unleash them on the world. I have a lot of time off over the Christmas holidays and will definitely dedicate some of it to being creative without work distractions… I’m constantly inspired by attending WORD! and chatting with people like Lydia and other friends of mine.

Recently, someone asked me about my music and how I define it. It’s a question I hate being asked because I always struggle to find an answer. Today I was thinking about my week… about my year infact and how much my friends mean to me and the answer finally hit me. My music is love. I write about the things that I love. My friends, my family, my heroes, music, sci-fi, geek stuff; all the things that fill my heart. I’m very blessed to be surrounded by good and loving people who inspire and encourage me. I’m very thankful for all the people I have in my life.

I just wanted to end on that note.

Much love
*HUGS*

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